Popping the blog cherry

Well, I did it. I'm popping my blog cherry, I wish all the cherry popping in my life had been this easy and lacked the complete humilitation of earlier examples of cherry popping... in my life.

Enough about cherry popping, that shits wack.

I think the theme of this first post should revolve around the movie dumb and dumber. This movie, however comedically brilliant it was has haunted me since its 1994 release, which coincides perfectly with my arrival to Canada in the same year (I came from south africa). If my life were a novel this is where the teacher would remind you about FORESHADOWING. Anyways long story short I would guestimate that since 1994 until 2011 43.61% of the time I introduce myself to someone the first thing they say after hearing my name is one of three responses:

1.) Like Lloyd Christmas?
2.) Have you ever seen Dumb and Dumber
3.) hahahahahahahaha LLOYD CHRISTMAS!!!!

One day, someone is going to be in mid "Lloyd Chri.." I'm not sure how I type out a punch to the trachea, but thats why they stopped mid "christmas". This is fair warning, if you like your trachea all functional and non collapsey, get original.

Moving on

The jist of the blog will be hilarious things I see on a daily basis, below is a list of reasons to read my posts
-I live in hamilton
-I go to mohawk (Gimp capital of the golden horseshoe, I'm not kidding, ok I am but I've never seen so many gimpy kids under one instituational roof, it's wild...I would liken it to the mecca of gimpy kids)
-News, the news is hilarious... well at least I think it can be.
-I live in hamilton
-Facts. If you have ever spent a significant period of time with me you will know that I also have a pretty solid grasp on the art of useless facts, the plan is to enlighten your day with something you didnt know, didnt need to know, would probably rather not know, but now youll know.
-Any other shit I feel like posting, you know why? because its my fucking blog and I'm in mother fucking real life, not space and not a limo driver taking mary swanson to the airport so she can drop of ransom money to Joe Mentalino and J.P. Shay.

LLOYD OUT